By the three wizards on high, by the Van Daam thirst for lust, by the most feared and notorious name, John Hurt—WE HAVE RETURNED! After his parents perish in a car accident, Clint Howard is sent away to a Catholic military school where he is bullied by Bob Pinciotti. Forced to clean the church’s basement, occupied by Sarge “The Animal” Steele, Clint uncovers a hidden room which contains the instructions for a black mass to resurrect the damned soul of Richard Moll. With the powers of Hell and MS-DOS, Clint conjures the powers of darkness to consume his body and smite his enemies. We also inject Clint Howard into Marvel’s Cinematic Universe, and try to fix ‘Boo! A Madea Halloween’ with actual monsters. Boot up Windows ’95, secure that consecrated host, and give your corporeal form over to ESTEBAN™, because we are about to Google Translate some 13th century Latin into Evilspeak!
Logo Artwork by Davey “The Scaredy Cat” De Forne.